Thursday, 24 December 2015

Nerdversity Reviews: Cabin Pressure at Christmas (Moloka'i)


Cabin Pressure at Christmas (Moloka'i) aired on BBC Radio 4 on December 25th 2010 and starred:
  • Benedict Cumberbatch as Martin
  • Roger Allam as Douglas
  • Stephanie Cole as Carolyn
  • John Finnemore as Arthur
  • Ben Willbond as Mr. Alyakhin
The episode has a pre-credits scene and it's of Martin and Douglas doing a Christmas themed pre-flight check.

DOUGLAS Air con?
MARTIN: Off.
DOUGLAS: Anti-collision light?
MARTIN: On.
DOUGLAS: Fuel pump switches?
MARTIN: On.
DOUGLAS: Dasher?
MARTIN: On.
DOUGLAS: Dancer?
MARTIN: On.
DOUGLAS: Prancer and Vixen?
MARTIN: On. Comet?
DOUGLAS: On.
MARTIN: Cupid!
DOUGLAS: On.
MARTIN: Donner and Blitzen?
DOUGLAS: To the top of the porch, to the top of the wall.
MARTIN Dash away …
DOUGLAS and MARTIN: … dash away, dash away, all!

The episode begins with GERTI taking off from Hong Kong on their way back to Tokyo. Arthur's on board and clearly excited because it's Christmas Day. He starts mangling "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen", referring to it as "Get Dressed Ye Merry Gentlemen" and repeatedly singing "it is Christmas Day" in the bits he doesn't know. Martin and Douglas correct him on the Carol. Arthur asks them what they plan to do. Douglas intends to sleep, ring his daughter and then ingest a heroic amount of sushi. Martin however plans on lounging and reading. Arthur and Carolyn are going to have a very traditional Christmas dinner at a place called The Auspicious Pig and Whistle Old England Style Happy Pub. 

Carolyn rings the Sat com and tells them that they need to fly to Tokyo, pick up her and Mr. Alyakhin, a Russian Yacht broker and fly them to Hawaii. Martin and Douglas complain about it. Arthur is the most upset as he won't get to have a Christmas, Martin feels bad that Arthur isn't having one, so feels they should have one in the flight deck. Douglas begrudgingly agrees to it and then starts work on not only the Secret Santa and decorating the flight deck and making Christmas Dinner.

Meanwhile, Carolyn is dealing with Mr. Aliyakhin in the flight deck and is put off by his attitude towards her and her company. He refers to Carolyn as a "babushka" and GERTI as a "minibus with wings". She tries to convince him to use MJN for their future trips. Douglas meets Carolyn in the galley and talks to her about their plan and he gets his eye on the expensive wine Mr. Alyakhin gave her. He trades her names with the Secret Santa and walks off with the Wine, taking the chicken sandwich out the fridge to place in the vents.

Martin is busy at work on Arthur's stocking when Carolyn brings Mr. Alyakhin into the flight deck. Carolyn tells them of the other staff, which Douglas adds to, with the stewardesses, Holly, Ivy and Mary. Mr. Alyakhin takes Carolyn into the cabin to discuss their terms, Arthur, who had been stuffed into the flight deck locker to avoid Mr. Alyakhin, has stood on Martin;s green umbrella and had broken it. They turn it into their Christmas tree.

Mr. Aliyakhin is convinced Martin is a rulebreaker. They go back to the flight deck and see him with chocolate on his fingers. He accidentally lets slip that they've flown from Hong Kong to Tokyo and then onto Moloka'i. Mr. Alyakhin is now angry and notes that this is the kind of rule breaking that he was talking about. Douglas has a plan and pulls Arthur out of the locker and explains that he's Noel, their Christmas pilot, who's been hiding in the locker because it's his birthday and it's his surprise party. He was the one that flew them to Tokyo where Martin and Douglas picked up.

The episode ends with GERTI in Moloka'i and the crew enjoying a 4 minute Christmas celebration. Mr. Alyakhin has agreed to use MJN in the future. Martin gives Arthur his stocking, which contains an orange tic tac, a sugar sachet with a mouse drawn on it and some 5 pence pieces with chocolate on them. Douglas reveals his present to Arthur. He thinks that his christmas was only 4 minutes, but Douglas reminds him of the international date line, so it's now 12:01, on christmas day. Arthur reveals his present. He took the Petrus 05 that Douglas had his eye on, put in the orange tic tacs, some fruit juice and blitzed it in the microwave, mulling it. Douglas is enraged.